Ok the news report. Did I lose weight or not? Yes! I did it again. This is great. I don’t lose weight for ages, and then suddenly I am losing weight consistently three weeks in a row and this one makes four weeks.
I am now 121.5kg. I can’t see this lasting. I am not exercising. And I know that in order to make this lifestyle change a permanent feature of my life I am going to have to get off my bottom and on my feet and do something. So in honour of that fact. I am going to do 10 minutes of walking on my treadmill. Then at the hefty weight of 121.5kg I am going to let you know how it felt. Here goes…
Phew! Ten minutes and 5 seconds. Travelling at 4kph on a 5 degree upward incline. I didn’t have to go at that speed. I just knew I had to get “out of breath”. So I snuck the speed higher and higher until I had reached a point at which I knew I could do ten minutes but out of puff throughout. It wasn’t so bad. I am thirsty now though. That kind of exercise is going to make me dry which is a good thing because I need to increase my water intake. I added a small amount of orange squash to the water. Much easier to take. I have no idea how many calories I used, or how it affects me. Now I shall log on to my http://www.fatsecret.co.uk website and add that to the breakfast foods I consumed.
You know I still crave chips, even now at 10:20am – Chips made by the local chipshop. With some Brava Sauce I got given from Spain. (I mentioned I used to like “Patatas Brava” and began to explain how it was made to the person who recently went there on holiday. And they remembered me. How kind. How 20th Century!).
I ought to remind you – the reader – that I am not on a diet. I am exploring the emotional and mental side of being a fataholic and trying to stay “off the fat”. I am doing a home-made change of eating style which I have called my “paying attention” diet. Where nothing is off limits but when presented with a choice I would choose the low fat option each time.
Speaking of emotions and thoughts I was looking at myself in the mirror the other day, after a shower, and noticed that my arms are nearer to my body than they have been for ages. I had to jiggle myself about a bit to make sure it wasn’t just the way I happened to be standing at that moment. I was also told by my lovely, suportive and incredibly patient wife that the crease under my man-boobs has diminished to no crease at all. It seems I am “changing shape” along with everything else. The main reason I wanted to do things at such a tortuously slow pace anyway was to prevent sagging skin folds. You cannot go from 20 stone to 14 stone without having a little bit of flapping flesh. And I gather from research that the elastin in my skin is generally exhausted by the time I pass puberty so I may well be buggered whatever I do – but this shape-shifting is quite a positive feeling. It helps me (in my head) to stay focussed on the reason I am doing this. It’s not to lose weight, it’s to stay alive and keep my liver going after the serious diagnosis I received. I must keep going to make sure I can only pass away once all the debts and mortgages (that are part of normal life) are paid off, so my wife and kids have nothing to worry about. That’s my motivation I suppose. The family. I am not sure that if they weren’t about I wouldn’t be down the chippy buying a bag of fatty badness right now. Us fataholics are a tempestuous bunch ain’t we?
What do you think? Should I have a better reason for dieting? I’ve never been vain to that extent.
Ok. 1/2 litre of water consumed. 10 mins of my daily exercise done. Back to work then! See you next time.